This is the closest thing that comes to helping me understand & embrace what is still present between myself & a best friend who ended his life almost 4 years to this day. He couldn’t take the pain of Long Covid anymore & intimately bearing witness to that & a partner with LC only different symptoms, we were the only ones who really know what the other was going thru. What you wrote so deeply touches what I experienced with him as a partner in a friendship that knew no bounds despite a 3 decades age difference. Shared a birthday - maybe that’s why our souls connected so deeply - & even as I’m not lying around mourning, I still have friends telling me to “move on” & “let it go” when i talk about him as if he were here. Because to me, he is. 💞
This take resonates deeply with me. Thank you for sharing a tale of true modern love, which no doubt has ancient roots.
The idea of marriage between one man and one woman has been a device of patriarchy that led us to forget how much we can love others deeply - across generations and genders. You can be a teacher of those who have yet to understand 😉
Oh Emma, you articulated that so real & so deeply exactly how my heart, my mind, my soul experienced it. So grateful for your understanding of an experience that isn’t “typical” that i know of in this world we live in & yet was perhaps the deepest I’ve ever felt. I share it & allow it to be received as they are able & let it go to perhaps plant seeds that will grow. 🌱
I confess, iRene, that YES unsolicited advice with those 2 phrases were offered several times & appreciate much your support in ignoring it. And appreciate your peace blessing as well ☮️
This third presence is 'real'! My first marriage could not have produced this, ever. What the emotional security and love of the second union gave us, was time to be who we really were after disastrous marriages. He left this earthly world 3 years ago, suddenly. I feel guilty that I haven't been broken by it. True love endures all...
This is beautiful and reminds me of the concept introduced by Martin Buber of "I and Thou". the Christian liturgical year celebrates Trinity Sunday in a few weeks' time and it seems that this enabler soul- capacity may somehow embody the essence beyond the story where there are references to the Holy Spirit.... I am curious about your thoughts on this concept? Maybe I am totally misunderstanding the premise or is there room for this kind of thinking?
I don’t think you are misunderstanding it at all. I think you are extending it beautifully.
I would not want to claim Cynthia is specifically making a Buber or Trinitarian argument here, but the resonance is definitely there. The “abler soul” points to that mysterious third presence that can emerge between two people when love becomes more than attachment or need.
So yes, I think there is room for that reading. Maybe not as “this is exactly what Cynthia meant,” but as one way the teaching opens into lived Christian mystery.
And yes, the Holy Spirit may be quietly smiling in the corner.
Perhaps this "Third Presence", this inter-animated-connectedness is what enables or acts as a conduit for the psychic-telepathic communication between couples. My wife and I are at the stage we're we find each other having the exact same thought at precisely the exact same moment. Some might say that this is just the effect of longterm familiarity but I don't believe it is. "It" is a "Third Presence". I use the word "it" for lack of a better description. For it's not a "thing" but a reality, a consciousness . . . Oh there I go again, trying to grasp the ungrassable. 🥴😬
This is the closest thing that comes to helping me understand & embrace what is still present between myself & a best friend who ended his life almost 4 years to this day. He couldn’t take the pain of Long Covid anymore & intimately bearing witness to that & a partner with LC only different symptoms, we were the only ones who really know what the other was going thru. What you wrote so deeply touches what I experienced with him as a partner in a friendship that knew no bounds despite a 3 decades age difference. Shared a birthday - maybe that’s why our souls connected so deeply - & even as I’m not lying around mourning, I still have friends telling me to “move on” & “let it go” when i talk about him as if he were here. Because to me, he is. 💞
This take resonates deeply with me. Thank you for sharing a tale of true modern love, which no doubt has ancient roots.
The idea of marriage between one man and one woman has been a device of patriarchy that led us to forget how much we can love others deeply - across generations and genders. You can be a teacher of those who have yet to understand 😉
Oh Emma, you articulated that so real & so deeply exactly how my heart, my mind, my soul experienced it. So grateful for your understanding of an experience that isn’t “typical” that i know of in this world we live in & yet was perhaps the deepest I’ve ever felt. I share it & allow it to be received as they are able & let it go to perhaps plant seeds that will grow. 🌱
I confess, iRene, that YES unsolicited advice with those 2 phrases were offered several times & appreciate much your support in ignoring it. And appreciate your peace blessing as well ☮️
Loving the smiles……send as many as you want & I will bounce them right back 🙂↕️
This third presence is 'real'! My first marriage could not have produced this, ever. What the emotional security and love of the second union gave us, was time to be who we really were after disastrous marriages. He left this earthly world 3 years ago, suddenly. I feel guilty that I haven't been broken by it. True love endures all...
Inspiring. Trans-realmic - beyond time and space. That's the power of the heart. Eyes on the eternal. Thanks for this beautiful reflection.
This is beautiful and reminds me of the concept introduced by Martin Buber of "I and Thou". the Christian liturgical year celebrates Trinity Sunday in a few weeks' time and it seems that this enabler soul- capacity may somehow embody the essence beyond the story where there are references to the Holy Spirit.... I am curious about your thoughts on this concept? Maybe I am totally misunderstanding the premise or is there room for this kind of thinking?
I don’t think you are misunderstanding it at all. I think you are extending it beautifully.
I would not want to claim Cynthia is specifically making a Buber or Trinitarian argument here, but the resonance is definitely there. The “abler soul” points to that mysterious third presence that can emerge between two people when love becomes more than attachment or need.
So yes, I think there is room for that reading. Maybe not as “this is exactly what Cynthia meant,” but as one way the teaching opens into lived Christian mystery.
And yes, the Holy Spirit may be quietly smiling in the corner.
Thanks for your reply. I love imagining the Holy Spirit smiling quietly in the corner!
This is a beautiful piece. “Through learning to bear the ache without fleeing it.”
Beautiful and deeply inspiring. I have a new podcast, Enter the Mystic's Garden, and wonder if you'd be interested in being a guest in the future.
Perhaps this "Third Presence", this inter-animated-connectedness is what enables or acts as a conduit for the psychic-telepathic communication between couples. My wife and I are at the stage we're we find each other having the exact same thought at precisely the exact same moment. Some might say that this is just the effect of longterm familiarity but I don't believe it is. "It" is a "Third Presence". I use the word "it" for lack of a better description. For it's not a "thing" but a reality, a consciousness . . . Oh there I go again, trying to grasp the ungrassable. 🥴😬
🌹Thank you for this beautiful essay. Rumi would have been delighted with it!🌅