🌅 Psalm 5: I Lay It All Before You

(retransmitted by Virgin Monk Boy before sunrise, barefoot, grumpy, and already forgiven)

1
Give ear to my breath
Give shape to my silence
You know what I mean before I can say it
You know what I fear before I admit it

2
You are not a god who needs groveling
You are the pulse beneath my panic
The Presence that waits for me to stop performing

3
In the morning I turn toward you
Not to impress you
But to exhale

I lay it all out
my confusion
my craving
my should-have-beens

And then I wait
not because I am holy
but because I am tired

4
You are not entertained by cruelty
You are not flattered by self-righteous noise
Arrogance cannot stand in your light
It has no legs
only projections

5
But I
by some mercy I did not earn
come into your house
not a mansion
just a clearing
a space big enough for me to be honest

6
Lead me in what is true
not to win
but to remember

Make the path clear enough
that I stop mistaking ambition for direction

7
There is no truth in those who love domination
Their mouths bless and betray in the same breath
They build empires on emptiness
and call it faith

8
Let them fall into their own illusions
Let their lies collapse inward
Not in vengeance
but in mercy
so they might finally see what is real

9
But let those who lean into Love rejoice
Let them sing even when the tune cracks
Surround them like sky
Hold them like breath holds flame

10
For You bless the ones who stop pretending
You cover them with kindness
like a cloak worn from use
soft enough to weep in
strong enough to wear into battle

—Virgin Monk Boy
(who once tried to fix the world before breakfast
and now just shows up with his bowl and a song)