When Facebook Comments Become a Full-Time Job: The Curious Case of Mark Lusardi
A comment thread so chaotic it deserves a Netflix docuseries — or at least a wellness check.
It started with a simple post — a meme quoting Lawrence O’Donnell, listing liberal achievements like getting women and African Americans the right to vote, passing the Civil Rights Act, creating Medicare, and more.
Cue the entrance of Terry Dean and Mark Lusardi, two Facebook warriors with the combined energy of a dive bar heckler and a malfunctioning spellcheck.
Chapter 1: Terry Opens the Portal
Terry Dean came in hot with the intellectual rigor of a used vape pen, calling Aleksander “David Riewe,” dropping slurs, and flexing 8th grade insults like it’s 1998 and we’re all in a Halo chat room.
Chapter 2: Mark Enters the Chat (and Never Leaves)
Mark Lusardi began what would become an epic descent into keyboard-induced madness. His greatest hits include:
Repeating “AND , ?” like a Gregorian chant for the grammatically challenged
Constructing sentences so disjointed they might qualify as abstract art
Claiming Aleksander’s comments were being stored in a “forensics file being developed”
Chapter 3: Aleksander Drops the Blessings
Aleksander (aka Virgin Monk Boy) took the stage like a linguistic samurai, offering both enlightenment and incineration. Each roast was dipped in clarity and served with a side of spiritual sass:
“Repeats ‘David Riewe’ like it’s Beetlejuice for brainworms.”
“That’s not a roast, Mark. That’s an acid trip through a high school English class you barely passed.”
“Your insults are punctuation cosplay.”
Chapter 4: The Fever Dream Escalates
Then Mark took a hard turn from quirky troll to full conspiracy theorist. In what might be the most unhinged comment of the year, he claimed Aleks’s comments would explain why he was “caught in a Milwaukee ghetto with body parts from young Asian boys.”
Yes. He typed that. On Facebook. Sober (we assume).
Chapter 5: The “Forensics File”
Just when you thought it couldn’t get weirder, Mark dropped this gem:
“We enjoy your subtle profanity, which will be useful in your forensics file being developed.”
That’s not a mic drop. That’s a cry for adult supervision and a reminder that not everyone should have Wi-Fi access after midnight.
Closing Blessing
Virgin Monk Boy Blessing™:
May your next sentence contain both a subject and a verb.
And may your keyboard forgive you for the crimes you commit against grammar every time you log on.
Moral of the Story
When the facts are strong, trolls get weird.
When the roast is spiritual, the meltdown is biblical.
And when all else fails… invent a “forensics file.”
Stay blessed. Stay spicy. And may your punctuation never be weaponized in vain
Before you vanish back into the illusion—smash that LIKE or SHARE button like it’s a temple gong. One tiny click, one cosmic ripple. That’s how we spread the heresy of hope and grow this little corner of soul-awakening satire.
And if this jolt stirred something in your chest cavity, consider upgrading to a paid subscription. It keeps the scrolls coming, the incense burning, and the heretic coffee hot. ☕️💚
(Yes, you can literally buy me a coffee. Enlightenment isn’t free, darling.)
Gotta love the broken record tactic. All the wit and determination of a second grader whose mommy forgot to give him his post-Cocoa Puffs dose of Ritalin before school.